Save Me From Myself
by Introvert With A Keyboard
Summary: Emma struggles with multiple demons, suffering in silence as always. But what happens when she fails to hid it as well as she thought she could and people start to pick up on it, especially Regina. Can Regina save the savior? Can she open her heart to love? Can she manage to break Emma's wall? TW: for eating disorders and self harm.


**Trigger Warnings for Self Harm and Eating Disorders**

 **Disclaimer: The characters are not mine, only the plot.**

This is my first SQ fanfic, enjoy! And please review to give me feedback :)

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Chapter 1: I Am Damaged

Emma's Pov

Emma is jolted awake to the blaring sound of her phone ringing, 'what now' she thought. She picked up her old battered black iPhone and answered it without even thinking to check who was calling.

"Hello Sweetheart" Snow's voice ran through Emma's head like a siren.

"Oh hey Mary Margaret" she groggily croaks out.

"Emma..." she says in a hurt tone, "Why don't you come over for breakfast?!" She says far more cheerfully than Emma was expecting. 'SHIT' Emma thinks as she is flooded with panic and anxiety, "Umm.. I already had breakfast" she stutters out the quickest think she can come up with.

"Really? Already? How early did you wake up Emma? It's only 6:00am." Mary Margaret replies.

'God dammit why is she calling so early' Emma thinks becoming very agitated. "Uhhh, I was out for a run!" She answers, quickly trying to find a way to end the phone call. "Look Mary Margaret, I have to go take a shower than do some work... I'll call you later or tomorrow, ok bye..!" She rapidly says and hangs up before Snow could even get another word in.

'What should I do?!' Emma thinks...

 _Flashback..._

 _'what to wear...' Emma mutters to herself, 'she picks out a pair of old jeans and starts to put them on when... 'come on you damn zipper!' Emma continues to mutter to herself as she struggles to put her jeans on. 'This are only like a year old' she mutters getting more frustrated, 'How much do I even weight?' She wondered as she scampered over to the bathroom and pulled out the scale. She takes a deep breath than step onto it, her eyes practically bulging out of her head when she sees the number the scale lands on._

 _"FUCK!" She cries stepping off the scale, that's at least 20 pounds more than she was last month. That's it, she needs to take care of this now, she figures... back to her old coping ways._

 _End of flashback..._

She sits on her bed contemplating everything. It's been 2 weeks since she reverted to her old eating habits, and so far she's lost 10 pounds and has consumed less than 800 calories in the 2 weeks, and it hasn't been easy. She been avoiding food like the plague and it's worked, but it has been raising suspicion.

For example her lunches with Regina, that she has been constantly skipping, coming up with excuse after excuse. Or skipping 'Family Dinners' with her parents, which has been making Snow very upset. Or the fact that she's facing many demons from her past, and coping with the voices results in long sleeve sweaters and capris or tights during Main's hot summer.

Emma knows no matter what she can't go to a dinner or breakfast or anything to do with food with anyone one so when she is pulled out of her thoughts by a quiet ding and a text on her screen her stomach sinks.

Regina/ Miss Swan contrary to what you might think you skipping out lunches does not please me and I will no longer tolerate it. You will meet me at my office in an hour or I will come and get you at the station myself!

'Hhmmff, damn stubborn Regina' she agitatedly mutters, as she types out her response, trying to come up with convincing excuses. When she feels satisfied, she sends the text hoping she wormed her way out of it.

Emma/ Im sry I've skipped out lately, but I've just been swamped with work at the station. I would have lunch with u but I already promised MM that I would. And I'm staying home because I've not been feeling well, maybe next week?

'There that out to do it' she figures, 'plus if I don't eat much until then I should be able to have a small salad' she reasons with herself.

Then her screen light up again and her stomach sinks further as she mutters as many curses she can think of.

Regina/ What is up with you lately Emma? Because we both know that's not true! Mary Margaret stooped to calling me this morning worried about you. If your at home as you say, than I will bring you some chicken soup and we can have a well need chat! See you in ten, you better be there!

"FUUUUCCK" Emma screamed collapsing onto the bed. "How am I supposed to fix this? What do I do? I can't eat that? Oh my god she's gonna find out?! This place is a mess! What do I do?!" Emma rambled on climbing off the bed

She takes a good look at the the loft and it's a mess! The whole place reaks of alcohol and peroxide. Her floor if covered in bottles and her bed is soiled with dry blood.

The realization hit her that Regina is gonna be there and less than ten minutes and there is now way she can ever see the place like this.

She quickly springs to her feet sprinting down to the kitchen to grab a garbage bag then sprints back to her room. She frantically throws all the bottles into the bag then stuff it in the closet.

She checks her phone, 7 minutes...

She rips her comforter from her bed and runs downstairs to throw it in the washing machine. Then she grab another and runs back to put it on her bed.

She checks her phone, 5 minutes...

'Fuck' she thinks but the adrenaline pumping through her keeps her moving.

She grabs the razors towels bandages and peroxide and stuffs them in her desk drawer.

She checks her phone... 4 minutes

She runs down stairs and starts to spruce up the place, throwing the dishes in the washer, hiding the alcohol, putting pillows and blankets on the couch. Just making it look presentable

She checked her phone, 1 minute...

She finishes by coating the entire house in febreeze then running upstairs to change.

She puts on a blue hoodie and grey sweatpants the plops on the couch turning on the tv.

*knock knock knock*

"Emma? Open the door!"

"Be right there Regina" Emma responds feeling content that she cleaned up, but still very anxious.

She opens the door and see Regina standing there with a thermos of soup, a Tupperware of salad and a tub of Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road.

All Emma can think about is the food that she cannot possibly eat, so much so the she doesn't even hear Regina calling her name.

"Emma? EMMA?" Regina calls noticing Emma eyes zoning out and a look of panic on her face.

"What?" Emma responds snapping out of it

"Are you going to invite me in?" She responds in an annoyed tone.

"Uhh, yeah right" Emma answers anxiously still a little hazed and very worried about what in her arms.

Regina moves past her and Emma shuts the door.

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Thanks sooo much for reading, please review me, i'd love to hear your thoughts :)


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